After that somber Amber Alert Post, I had to post a funny one. This could easily happen in my neck of the woods :) I titled it:
A redneck family from the hills was visiting the city and they were in
a mall for the first time in their lives. The father and son were
strolling around while the wife shopped. They were amazed by almost
everything they saw, but especially by two shiny, silver walls that
could move apart and then slide back together again. The boy asked,
"Paw, what's at?"
The father (never having seen an elevator) responded, "Son, I dunno. I
ain't never seen nuttin' like that in my entire life, I ain't got no idea'r what it is."
While the boy and his father were watching with amazement, an
overweight, elderly lady in a wheel chair rolled up to the moving walls and pressed a button. The walls opened and the lady rolled between them into a small room. The walls closed and the boy and his father watched the small circular number above the walls light up sequentially.
They continued to watch until it reached the last number and then the numbers began to light in the reverse order. Then the walls opened up again and a gorgeous, voluptuous 24 year-old blonde woman stepped out.
The father, not taking his eyes off the young woman, said quietly to
his son, "Boy..................go git cha Momma.......... "